Secrets To Living A Balanced Life

Last weekend I made a last minute decision not to record a podcast. With family day falling on the Monday and the weekend off work (I’m a server at this incredible restaurant) I decided to take that as a sign to instead relax and enjoy the time off with my family.

I think so often we get caught up in what we think we’re supposed to be doing that we forget that we do in fact make the decisions and can change plans at any time.

Instead of feeling pressured to keep my weekly commitment, I realized that going with the flow felt much more balanced for me and recognized that spending more time with my family was exactly what I both wanted to be doing and what I felt I needed to be doing. Investing time in my relationship with my partner Deryk and with my children is very important to me and I also realized that I deserved to take the time off. So in the future, I’ll be creating more freedom around my podcast and taking time off as needed. 

Now to the topic of finding balance. Balance is an interesting word. You’ve heard of work/life balance, so finding time for both work and play...there’s the balance with your eating habits which is one I’ll be talking about very soon then one that’s super important to me is finding the balance with technology.  So that’s being mindful of when we’re on our phones and tablets with what’s going on around us. And making sure that we’re both safe, so not driving AND a good role model, so not being on our technology all day in front of our kids. 

I think I define balance a little differently I think than most people.

To me, balance is not about making everything equal and it’s not reaching a final destination. It’s about balancing the things you have going on in your life and giving the required time needed on a consistent basis so that you feel like you have a handle on your life. So you don’t feel overwhelmed constantly. So you can feel peaceful and calm. Doesn’t that sound amazing? You have to make time for finding balance. It’s a habit and it’s a process and takes ongoing work. But it’s possible!! I have two young children, one with type 1 diabetes plus I work outside of the home 4 evenings a week plus Sundays..yet I can honestly say that most of the time I feel balanced and at peace with my life. 

Balance is a major focus in my life.

If you’ve been following along with my podcast then you know that I’m a huge advocate for me time. And I believe that this is the secret to living with balance. It’s the self love component. It’s about giving to ourselves so that we have the energy to give to others. When you put yourself first and make your 'me time' a priority, so much can shift!  You can look at life with a different perspective. You can see where you need to spend your energy that day...and so you can more easily prioritize.  My me time is most often spent at the gym. I take 2 hours to myself 4-5 mornings a week after I drop my 5 year old Reese off at school and after I drop my 2 1/2 year old Quinn off at the gym daycare. It’s really so good for both of us. And even if I choose not to have a workout, I’ll enjoy me time in the sauna where I’ll read at least a page of a book and that's followed by an uninterrupted shower. Which as a mother is as good as gold. Taking these 2 hours a day to myself really allows me to feel at peace with my life. I’m creating the break that I need and therefore I’m a huge part of creating the balance in my life. I don’t let life happen to me. I’m in charge of my life. And so are you. We’re have a lot more control than we sometimes realize. 

I read an article recently that said balance was such an overused word and that the idea of balance is crazy. To have everything balanced in life isn’t possible is essentially what the message was. And I agree. I don’t give the same amount of time to ANYTHING in my life. But I do give the required time to everything that needs my attention.

And I think if we change our definition of balance that we can in fact feel balanced. 

Feelings balanced me for is also about decluttering. And that’s not something that happens once a year. It’s a weekly practice of letting go. Letting go of old household items we're not using, clothes that no longer fit, cleaning out my kids craft cupboard and not feeling obligated to keep every art project. It can be overwhelming with children. There’s always so much new stuff coming in so we need to create a habit of letting go. Have you heard the expression “Let go of the old to make room for the new”. It’s a good one. And when you do this consistently, you make space for abundance to flow into your life. 

Every 6 Weeks I arrange for Diabetes Canada to come to my house to pick up at least one bag of clothes. Creating this habit keeps me in the mindset of letting go of what we don’t need and I feel good about giving regularly to a cause I believe in and support. Keeping things simple and clutter free allows me to think more clearly and this is a huge contributor to feeling balanced. As a believer in Feng Shui, the home is a direct reflection of what’s going on in our outside world and by making time to keep our homes in order we'll make a direct impact on feeling more balanced in our lives. 

I also attribute feeling balanced to music. I love the spa channel...it’s super relaxing and I put it on in the morning while I do my daily practice of giving gratitude.

I also have a few rock Salt lamps in my home and I keep them on all the time. They omit negative ions which help to balance against technology and the result is a calm energy that we can actually feel. Both my girls have them in their bedrooms and we have a larger one in our main living space. Once I had a teenager in my home comment that it felt so calm, like a spa.  And I attribute the rock salt lamp for her feeling that way. 

Now sleep is definitely a contributor to feeling more balanced but this isn’t one that us parents get a lot of. One of the tricks I use is to give gratitude for sleep as often as I can.   I’m also careful not to talk to everyone I see about how tired I am. I don’t focus on it and then I find I actually get solid pockets of sleep. And I used to skip afternoon naps - feeling like I was actually more tired but now I get a few things done around the house when my daughter goes down for a nap and take 15-20 minutes to close my eyes. I feel more refreshed this way and still feel accomplished. And this helps me to feel more balanced.

Whatever you have going on in your life that feels overwhelming can be shifted. Making time for you and for caring for your home can really make a huge difference to feeling more balanced. Again, it’s an ongoing practice, not a destination. 

And remember not to say yes to everything. Say yes to what works for you and your family. Say yes to what makes your heart happy. You deserve to feel balance in your life AND it’s completely possible.